Brian Bernard…

…is kid tested and bad muthaf**ker approved.

Brian Bernard…

…has a chocolate halo.

Brian Bernard…

…believes that everyone has at least one great feature. What’s yours?

Brian Bernard…

…is looking for the lady with the other glass slipper.

Brian Bernard…

…is considering getting vacuum sealed to retain his freshness.

Brian Bernard…

…is selling himself to the highest bidder!

Brian Bernard…

…is so fly, he should get Air Miles.

Brian Bernard…

…is the bad boy version of Gordon from Sesame Street.

Brian Bernard…

…does not like fondue.

Brian Bernard…

…woke up today with ridiculous swagger. Today is going to be great!